Thin. Skinny. Svelt. All compliments so many women long to hear, and so many women struggle and put themselves through torture so they can hear it. So many don't want to be just a healthy weight but exceptionally skinny. Size zero, catwalk skinny. Emaciated even. The size zero trend has begun to take over women in first world countries all over. Women want to see bones rather than curves. The desire to be as skinny or skinnier than the other women is so strong that women are willing to risk their health to win the label. Now I want to see exactly what women put themselves through to achieve their size zero goal.
I am going to use the methods of restriction and exercise to attempt to lose weight in the manner many models, actresses, dancers and other performers do in order to be super-skinny. I will do so until I reach my target weight, recording each step of the way. What I am doing is easily defined as crash dieting. I am attempting to go from consuming 1400-1800 calories per day to 1000 or less. I want to understand how well this works and what it entails. I am doing this on my own without any monitoring other than my own. Because of this, I will be careful not to be so extreme that I make myself ill. I will be sure to take a supplement so I can continue to function properly while restricting my diet. I am about to cut out half of the foods I normally eat, and about half the portions of what's left. I will likely have to learn not to be full because I will not make much progress if I am full after every meal.
A quick background: I am a 22 year old student studying dance, English and journalism. I am currently a healthy 115 pounds but am packing some extra weight around my midsection and hips. I have been struggling to get to my ideal weight of 105 pounds since I was seventeen and began to put on weight after puberty. I would say I put on weight moderately easy if I don't watch my diet closely. I was always on the skinny side as a child, until soon after I started my period and I couldn't eat whatever I wanted without gaining anything. It has been hard to find a balance with food because I always have had a healthy appetite and I love to eat. As a dancer, I could stand to lose a few pounds. I am not comfortable in a swimsuit. I am by no means fat, just not as skinny as I want to be. Pure and simple. I don't want to lose weight for anyone but myself. I want to feel better about my body and for me, that means 10 pounds thinner. I want to stand out as the slim girl, not average. That is just who I am. I am a happier person when I weigh less.
I in no way want to be unhealthy, emaciated, or anorexic. I simply want to see what it is like to use this method to lose the last 10 pounds I've been trying to shake for years. I want to understand what women put themselves through to reach size zero, and whether or not it is effective or worth the work. I am aiming for size zero because when I weighed 105 I wore a size zero Mostly, I want to know the long term effects of what I am about to do, and whether it will be a life-changing experience or simply another fad diet that gets me closer to my target weight. At the beginning of this experiment, I can tell you that in no way do I enjoy starving myself. I love food and it is difficult for me to short myself of the foods I enjoy so much. I will not purge myself as a part of this experiment, as I have no desire to become bullimic. I do understand that the so-called crash diet can lead to anorexic tendencies and I am aware of this as a potential side-effect. I am doing this as a method journalist and do not recommend or encourage others to follow my lead.
I would also like I mention I do have a significant other. I will undoubtedly mention him in this diary so I can understand the effects on others around me. If at any time this becomes unhealthy for our relationship, I am going to stop immediately.
And by the way, starting weight/measurements:
115lbs (52.27 kilos, 8.21 stone)
Bust: 36"
Under bust: 32"
Waist: 27"
Hips: 32"
Best regards,
La Ballerine
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